Tuesday, March 27, 2012

Heavy.

Its been almost 2.5 months since my last post. I honestly didn't know it had been that long and I kind of forgot what my blog looked like. But I am back at it. Over the rare occurrence of me cooking dinner for my other half tonight- I thought about my blog and what I wanted to write about. Yes, I want to (and plan to) tell you about the products I use on my hair, my current nail polish or my recent weekend. But as I was thinking about it, I feel like I have so much to say. More....heavy topics if you will. I truly love to write and think of writing a novel often. My fingers are thankful to be busy right now...the fast-tapping of the keys calms me.

Tonight my heart is feeling heavy. Heavy with sadness for a friend who is going through something horrible. We met the end of 2008 through a Bootcamp class...she was the strong runner- and I always remember thinking "How in the hell does she not sweat?" While I was gasping for air. Fast forward to March 2012. We have been on too many runs to count...with the memories and baggage to prove it. She hates dogs that are loose- I turn into a bootcamp instructor yelling "GO HOME!". We get lost together, dodge bats together and curse at eachother in our heads while running straight up the most serious hill in this state. Or wait- is that just me? We have ran hundreds of miles together, several half marathons and our very first marathon- together. You learn a lot about a person when you are running for hours together. No where to go but forward, no one to talk to but eachother. We've had sweat in our eyes, cried about life while running, and solved the world's problems during these runs. She is a much better runner than I, always faster, always stronger. But doesn't mind running twice in one day (and slowing down for you) if you ask her too- because she knows how much the company is sometimes needed. She is the wittiest person I know and the reason I started tweeting. I have no clue where she comes up with the randomness that are her tweets- but they are usually nothing short of epic.

I am no stranger to Cancer. Its a sonofabitch that affects so many people every day. And I hate it. And I mean hate, with every fiber in my body. I don't feel the need to delve into my own personal story (quite yet)...I just wanted to empty my heart, for the ache it feels for her. There is nothing fair about watching someone you love go through something as painful and mean as cancer. It shows no mercy- and causes nothing but pain. It leaves me speechless as there is nothing you can say to someone going through something like this. The "it will be okays", the "keep your head ups", the "time will heal all wounds" is nothing someone who is going through this wants to hear. Because its not okay, no one wants to hold their head up and time sucks. Its just how it is.

Maghan, in case you haven't figured it out {I mean, who else grabs tiny twigs to ward away loose dogs}...this post is for you. I am thinking and praying for you and your family. I am here for you, if for nothing else than to cry with. I know I have told you before- but if there is anything you need- I'm only a text, tweet, FB msg, call or lifeline away. Much love.

2 comments:

diana said...

Beautiful.

Janna Renee said...

My friend Lauren is on her second bout with Cancer, and I find it hard to find the right things to say. I just send as much love and support as I can...I also send it you and your friend. My heart aches for y'all as well.